“Destroy the mysteries and then go fight Chewbacca!”: A Bad Lip Reading of the Democratic candidates debate

By on October 29, 2015

The wonderfully clever folks (although it may be just one guy, who the hell knows?) behind the Bad Lip Reading Youtube page have just released their take on the first Democratic presidential debate of the 2016 election, which was held just a few weeks back — and it almost seems like a distant memory now, especially since today everyone is talking about last night’s third Republican candidates debate.

So, if you’re keeping score at home, debate-wise, that’s GOP 3, DEMS 1 so far, but the BLR folks cleverly snuck this one out yesterday, Wednesday, October 28, just ahead CNBC’s debate broadcast, and today we’re sharing it with you, just as we’d shared the BLR of the Republican candidates debate a few months back.

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If you watched the funny clip at the link we shared with you last time, you saw that the Republican candidates made some bold-ass statements, like when Texas senator Ted Cruz told us “I will drink a sorority’s goldfish,” and Florida senator Marco Rubio boldly stated “I own a parrot that doesn’t drink.”

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Not to be outdone, the Democrats discussed a variety of topics during their mostly-civil debate, including the fact that former candidate Jim Webb (who has already dropped out of the race) likely killed the Viet Cong soldier who shot him, although the BLR treatment shows that it’s possibly no one knew who he was up at the podiums (we should probably also mention here that former Rhode Island Governor Lincoln Chafee also ended his own long-shot bid for the 2016 Democratic presidential nomination last week too).

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The BLR folks also introduce new segments this time around, such as “Noun Challenge” — former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, the front-runner in most Dem polls, challenged her closest challenger in the race for the Democratic party nomination, Senator Bernie Sanders (I-Vermont), to list 10 nouns in 13 seconds. That proves to be a difficult challenge for Sanders.

Another new segment includes “Drawing Corner,” and there’s some discussion of whether or not Anderson Cooper should get a scooter. We also learn that Mrs. Clinton makes“dynamite” pinto beans.

There’s a tense moment when former Maryland Governor Martin O’Malley, who is trying to think about where babies come from, turns quickly to Clinton, who seems to be staring at him.

“Can I help you?” O’Malley snaps at Clinton, then he says to moderator Anderson Cooper, “I don’t like how she stares. It’s super creepy. And I think I can say where babies came from without her blinking at me.”

“I’m serious, you need to stop, okay?,” he says again, turning back to Clinton. “Have fun in staring class.”

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It’s Senator Sanders (called Colonel Sanders at one point), who gets the last word, though, leaving us with a wonderful little poem of his own composition, which ends with this challenge to all who are listening in:

“Destroy the mysteries and then go fight Chewbacca!”

Once again, we’re also going to share this one, the granddad of these mock-dubbing videos: it appeared on the “Night Flight” TV show back in the day and starred Nancy and Ronald Reagan talking about Nancy’s rampant drug use.

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About Bryan Thomas

Bryan Thomas has been a freelancing writer/critic for All Music Guide, and a contributor to Launch, Music Connection, Big Takeover and numerous other publications and entertainment websites, blogs and zines, most of them long gone. He's written more than sixty sets of liner notes. He’s also worked for over twenty years at mostly reissue record labels -- prior to that he worked in bookstores and record stores, going all the way back to the original vinyl daze. He lives in the Miracle Mile neighborhood of Los Angeles, CA.